Women Raise Your Standards!

Dating at the age of 21 can be extremely hard, especially for women. Women are often criticizes for how they should present themselves (dress, act, maintenance), women are generally more concerned about marriage and children, and women are programmed to have the "princess" mentally. Meaning that one day our dream guy will whisk us away to a beautiful castle and we will live happily ever after. They leave out parts like, people are normal with their own problems, you have to earn your castle, and that there are 7 billion people in the world. So the question is how do we know if we've found a good catch?

Let's start by saying, no one should settle for something or someone whom you do not want. Yes, relationships takes compromise, but compromise does not mean lower your standards. Compromise is simply bending them, for example; if one of your standards is guys with luxury cars; a decent compromise would be talking to a guy who drives a nice 2014 Toyota Camry. You don't know what the guy has or is planning for his life so if he has a decent economy car that doesn't describe the essence of his character. Besides you would rather someone with a simple lifestyle that they can afford over someone with an expensive lifestyle that they can't keep up with. However you wouldn't talk to a guy with a beat up 2003 Ford Focus, because this is completely left field from your standard. This may be an example of a superficial standard, but at least it’s a standard. Material items say a lot about a person's character such as; money management, priorities, style, and often goals. These are all characteristics that will help you find a good catch who meets the standards you create, which ranges from person to person. Meaning for example; a person who aspires to be a mechanic might like their significant other to drive a 2003 Ford Focus.

At the age of 21 the average woman is in school, working or both. If you're 21 with a child then what you're looking for in a guy may not match up to the 21 year old without children. Those with children should always put their children priorities and needs before their own, and your significant other should also. Your companion should be fully aware of you having a child, because if they’re long term than this ultimately affects the relationship. So as a standard you should consider how they are with children. For those of you without children, some good standards should include; reliable income, long-term goals, transportation, spirituality, hygiene.

Income:

Whether your significant other has job or not is a factor, but should not be the only relevancy to your standards. Is their income reliable? Are they in a job or a career? You have to know where this person mindset is. I wouldn't want my significant others career to be a fry cook at McDonald's, if my career is in corporate America. Ultimately the “bread maker” (the greater income) is usually the head of the relationship, unless your incomes are almost identical. You have to pick your position. More money more power!

Goals:

Everyone needs goals, or you’re just a lost person in my perspective. If you’re not working towards something, what are you really doing? Goals can be anything, just make sure you have them and are driven towards them. People without goals are just alive to work, pay bills, and die. It’s okay if you haven’t discovered your goals yet, you have time, but in that case I don’t recommend you looking for a significant other either. That’s too much confusion.  

Spirituality:

This may be the number one standard for most people. Spirituality sets the foundation of the household. This doesn’t mean that you have to assign your relationship to a specific religion or that you have to date someone of the same religion. This standard is simply saying that you guys have come to an agreement of values and morals inside of your relationship and home. Even if that means you have none.

Hygiene

This is significant because a person’s hygiene may seem small now, but long term it can develop into a serious issue. For instance, say you guys move in together how the home is kept will matter in the long run for to the both of you. I couldn’t be someone who doesn’t share kitchen responsibilities with me.  

Before setting your standards first figure out YOURSELF! Think long and hard about who you are, what you want, and what you’re looking for in a companion. These are a few examples of standards that matter for me. Throughout your relationships you’ll find out what you will tolerate from another person, but always keep in mind of what’s best for you.