My First Kiss & Love (Details) #30DayBlogChallenge

Day 3

Your first love & first kiss; if different discuss both!

This is a very personal question for most, including myself. When topics like this are discussed we tend to be very careful about the details because you never know who's watching, listening, or in this case reading. I will briefly discuss my first kiss first, because it's very simple and straight to the point. 

First Kiss

I was 12 years old in 8th grade (yes I know I was young in 8th grade), attending Chamblee Middle School in Atlanta, GA, this was 1 year after Hurricane Katrina Struck my home city(New Orleans). I guess I was dating this boy name Shaquille Muhammed, we both didn't know what dating really entailed, but we just copied our associates and TV. Anyways all we did was walk around the school together, and at the end of the day he walked me to my bus. I leaned in for a hug, but he kissed me instead, it caught me completely off guard. I don't know if this was his first kiss, but it was mine, and the relationship lasted a total of 4 days lol. 

Now First Love

Love is defined as a feeling of deep romantic or sexual attachment for someone. Some argue if you can control who you love or not; my perception is that love is a feeling and all feelings can be controlled. Now if that person has learned to control them or not is a different scenario, but we all have the ability to. A person show you their characteristics and you ultimately decide if you will tolerate the good and bad parts. 

My first love was a guy who I'll keep name disclosed. He was a senior in High School and I was a freshman, No, I do not condone the relationship, now that I look back on it, but hey I was young. I am what you call an "old soul" so the people I usually like gives me a unique perspective about the world we live in, music, art, science etc... I enjoy actual conversations that I can debate, learn, elaborate, and build off of, and at 14 most people only care about the new music or tv programs. Not me. So when I met an older person who was thinking about the things I was, the fascination began. I fell in love with him. I became attached to him. He introduced a different perspective of life to me, beyond the normal read the bible, go to college, and get a good job, and I loved it. Everything began to make sense! Today I still use both the things he taught me along side of my own developed knowledge and the previously taught information. The relationship lasted on and off throughout my entire high school years, until we officially broke up 5 months before my graduation. I found out he was cheating on me and had gotten another girl pregnant, I was devastated. I then went to college and well that's another story. He was my first love, I have no clue if he even loved me, but he was mine. 

Last night I just discussed the topic of love, how genders love and the difference between love, desire, and obsession.

How men love:

Now I'm not a man, but from experience; men find love. Meaning that we all have a particular way we vision love, and most men relate love to physical attraction. When they first experience love they expect it to physically be this perfect person without regards to the actual feeling of the relationship. So often once a man loses the relationship is when he realizes that he was feeling love, and from then on he will compare all others he encounters to that feeling that was once felt "love." A relate-able phrase would explain this as, most men find love and compare it to the "lost one."    

How women love:

Women seek love. A woman's love is based on desires and feelings oppose to the physical attraction of a person. This is why women often fall in love with their “best friends." We love the people who make a feel good or make us feel the way we want to feel, even if that doesn't necessarily mean a good or positive feeling. We become accustomed to a feeling and if it correlates to our desires we seek what resembles those feelings. Most women seek love and adjust to the situation.

This explains why men actually love harder than women, and possibly never get over their first true love. They try to match the feeling instead of realizing it'll never happen in the same way with a different person. This also explains why women tend to fall in "love" faster than men, because they're seeking to do so. Failing to realize that no matter how you adjust to the situation, every situation is different and you will encounter different feelings that you'll have to learn to control. So your love for another being may or may not be explainable to others, but as long as you find your balance that's all that matters.